Monday, October 12, 2009

No Fault? How 'Bout Yo' Fault?

Today is the day I have been waiting for since early April.
The first leg of my in-depth custody evaluation begins at 10.
I haven't been personality tested since high school.

Oregon is a no-fault divorce state. As far as the court is concerned, they could give a rat's infected ass about Fuck My Wife ads, stranger-donated blow jobs on the couch with the children asleep upstairs, and that the philandering husband travels three to four days a week. As far as a simple divorce is involved, who cares? However, once children are involved, those sorts of things become custody issues -- and the only person who cares about those things is a custody evaluator. And a very expensive one, might I add. But he will take those lapses in judgment into consideration when he mades his reco to the court. A judge would have ignored it.

The Manny and his braintrust board of directors will be playing the crazy card, followed with a dose of medical marijuana harassment, followed by a rash of hot lies and exaggerations, and then try to drive it all home with a story about a lady who went bonkers and left her husband over a little high fructose corn syrup in a bunch of fictional women's soda pop. The five-page slamifesto his lawyers preemptively twittered out to the evaluator about my ineptitudes as a human/mother read like a one-hour dramady that smacks of Ally McBeal and the baby-dancing days. I received it on Friday via the attorneys I am trying to release (with little success). The Manny's granny's have very smartly written a letter purporting to be in his very own words. He hasn't written anything longer than 5-pages that wasn't in power point in about 10 years, but what's the harm in another little pile of lies?

The only thing at stake here is the children. There is no money. There is no power. There is no property. There are no assets at all. There is nothing left but the two people who demanded to be here on this earth, via my body and who are made mostly of me. They are used to a geographically absentee father with a work addiction and a mother who is ready and available for them at all times, just let me adjust my schedule. I am not saying he's not a good dad. I am saying he's a pain in my ass to have to share custody with because my life is beholden to his shitty last-minute schedule. I am not his wife anymore, which means I don't have to live and die by his work any longer. And neither should our children.

I've waited patiently for seven months for an opportunity to say so to someone who gives a fuck about the lessons about life and love I have yet to teach my children and is able to restore my rightful place in the better memories of their lives.

And with that, I'm off to fight fierce for love and passion.
Fuck money. That follows passion.



S said...

Good luck to you!!! I hope it all works out the way you want it to. :)

Cati said...

Good luck Dana, please keep us informed. Your kids clearly deserve to have their always available mother really close.
My thoughts are with you

joy said...

Sending all the positive energy I can!

megb said...

I have all the confidence in the world that your message will be clear, loving and focused on the well-being of your children. This is what pumps through your veins. There's no denying or mistaking the love you have for your children. You have designed your life to love and support them. I am so happy you are finally going to be able to have people listen to what you are living.

Anonymous said...

Best of luck to you and the kiddles. The solution is so obvious--they need their mommy. Stay strong!


keepitcomical/dana said...

thanks for your comments, guys. seems that some of you are clicking the movie and getting redirected to some hot porn. uh oh. it's not showing up that way on my computer. but then again, i have a mac. and mac users don't generally have these sorts of problems. so i don;t know what to say except this is and was supposed to be a movie of my daughter singling "not ready to make nice" not a video of some dude making nice with his junk.

sorry if your eyes fell out. i am trying to fix it, even though i have no idea what i am trying to fix.


mama without instructions said...

hey lady, a little late here but thinking of you and hoping the custody deal works out the way it should for you and the kids' sake. having this behind you will be amazing.